Caught in the Web:

 

Best of the E-mail Trail  (Many of these entries found their way to our in-box anonymously and/or without attribution.  If the authors would like to come forward, we would be happy to provide credit or remove entry).

 

Kicking a can.

Working in Mexico

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Making the email rounds from Tom O'Malley, a Director with S.W. BELL in Mexico City:

'I spent five years working in Mexico.  I worked under a tourist Visa for three months and could legally renew it for three more months. After that you were working Illegally. I was technically illegal for three weeks waiting on the FM3 approval.

'During that six months our Mexican and U.S. attorneys were working to secure a permanent work visa called a 'FM3'. It was in addition to my U.S. passport that I had to show each time I entered and left the country. Barbara's was the same, except hers did not permit her to work.

'To apply for the FM3, I needed to submit the following notarized originals (not copies):

   1. Birth certificate for Barbara and me.

   2. Marriage certificate.

    3. High school transcripts and proof of graduation.

    4. College transcripts for every college I attended and proof of graduation.

    5. Two letters of recommendation from supervisors I had worked for at least one year.

   6. A letter from the St. Louis Chief of Police indicating that I had no arrest record in the U.S. and no outstanding warrants and, was 'a citizen in good standing.

   7. Finally, I had to write a letter about myself that clearly stated why there was no Mexican citizen with my skills and why my skills were important to Mexico. We called it our 'I am the greatest person on Earth' letter. It was fun to write.'

All of the above were in English that had to be translated into Spanish and be certified as legal translations, and our signatures notarized. It produced a folder about 1.5 inches thick with English on the left side and Spanish on the right.

Once they were completed Barbara and I spent about five hours, accompanied by a Mexican attorney, touring Mexican government office locations and being photographed and fingerprinted at least three times at each location, and we remember at least four locations where we were instructed on Mexican tax, labor, housing, and criminal law and that we were required to obey their laws or face the consequences. We could not protest any of the government's actions or we would be committing a felony. We paid out four thousand dollars in fees and bribes to complete the process. When this was done we could legally bring in our household goods that were held by U.S. Customs in Laredo, Texas. This meant we had rented furniture in Mexico while awaiting our goods. There were extensive fees involved here that the company paid.

'We could not buy a home and were required to rent at very high rates and under contract and compliance with Mexican law.

'We were required to get a Mexican driver's license. This was an amazing process. The company arranged for the licensing agency to come to our headquarters location with their photography and fingerprint equipment and the laminating machine. We showed our U.S. license, were photographed and fingerprinted again and issued the license instantly after paying out a six dollar fee. We did not take a written or driving test and never received instructions on the rules of the road. Our only instruction was to never give a policeman your license if stopped and asked. We were instructed to hold it against the inside window away from his grasp. If he got his hands on it you would have to pay ransom to get it back.

We then had to pay and file Mexican income tax annually using the number of our FM3 as our ID number. The company's Mexican accountants did this for us and we just sign ed what they prepared. I t was about twenty legal size pages annually.

The FM3 was good for three years and renewable for two more after paying more fees.

Leaving the country meant turning in the FM3 and certifying we were leaving no debts behind and no outstanding legal affairs (warrants, tickets or liens) before our household goods were released to customs.

It was a real adventure and if any of our Senators or Congressmen went through it once they would have a different attitude toward Mexico.

The Mexican government uses its vast military and police forces to keep its citizens intimidated and compliant. They never protest at their capitol or government offices, but do protest daily in front of the United States Embassy. The U.S. Embassy looks like a strongly reinforced fortress and during most protests the Mexican military surrounds the block with their men standing shoulder to shoulder in full riot gear to protect the Embassy. These protests are never shown on U.S. or Mexican TV. There is a large public park across the street where they do their protesting. Anything can cause a protest such as proposed law changes in California or Texas.'

Are we too hard on illegals?

The Ant and the Grasshopper Story

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This one is a little different.. Two Different Versions!  Two Different Morals!

OLD VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

-------------------------------------------

MODERN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving. CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.' Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, 'We shall overcome.' Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake. Nancy Pelosi and John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2008 ---- BUT BE SURE TO VOTE WHILE WE STILL HAVE THAT PRIVILEGE

 

Posted on Monday, May 5, 2008 at 12:45PM by Registered CommenterLowDownCentral | CommentsPost a Comment | EmailEmail | PrintPrint

No Longer Equipped for Aural Sex

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After a relaxing bath...Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself, nude in a mirror...

 

Her frustration over her lack of ability to lose weight, was depressing her...

In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help...

'God....If you take away my love handles, I'll devote my life to you,' She prayed...

And just like that... her ears fell off...

 

Posted on Thursday, April 3, 2008 at 10:52AM by Registered CommenterLowDownCentral in , | CommentsPost a Comment | EmailEmail | PrintPrint

Bill Richardson's "Judas" Moment

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Despite her appeal, Richardson ultimately endorsed Obama - which sent Bill Clinton into a purple rage last weekend during a private meeting with California superdelegates.

 

"Five times to my face [Richardson] said that he would never do that," the former president thundered.

 

Posted on Thursday, April 3, 2008 at 10:41AM by Registered CommenterLowDownCentral in , , | CommentsPost a Comment | EmailEmail | PrintPrint

Camouflaged Combat

Those sneaky marines...

Look closely

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Keep looking...

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See it now?

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If a Muslim sees a naked woman, they are supposed to kill themselves.

You got to love the Marines.  If you don't stand behind our troops, please feel free to stand in front of them.

Posted on Tuesday, March 4, 2008 at 09:35AM by Registered CommenterLowDownCentral in , , , | CommentsPost a Comment | EmailEmail | PrintPrint
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