by Lance Thompson

Comedian George Carlin had a well-known routine based on his memories of Catholic high school. He and his friends used to try to stump the priest with theological conundrums such as, "Could God make a rock so heavy that even He Himself couldn't lift it?" Carlin got laughs with this, but a similar question could be applied to Congress with less mirth.

"Could Congress write a bill so voluminous that Congress itself couldn't read it?" The answer to this is, sadly, "yes." More alarming is that under President Obama, this sort of unreadable legislation is becoming the norm. First there was the stimulus bill, which was passed because the president and the Democrats in Congress assured us that we were in an unprecedented economic crisis, and something had to be done immediately. The details were unimportant, they assured us, as they rushed the legislation through without giving Republicans or many Democrats time to read it. Immediate, drastic measures were needed, they insisted, rather than thoughtful consideration. Like the man in the leaky boat who drills a hole in the bottom to let the water out, they told us any action was better than nothing.

Now we have the cap-and-trade bill, rushed through before any evidence seeps out that global warming is a hoax, and that taxing individuals, companies and industries for doing what they're supposed to do is a recipe for economic paralysis. Again, a thousand unreadable pages is voted for or against by 435 representatives who haven't read it.

Mark Twain once said, "The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read." The Democrats in Congress seem to think illiteracy would be no handicap to a member of Congress. Republicans aren't allowed time to read legislation because, as Speaker Pelosi has explained, "they're against it anyway." And Democrats aren't given time to read it because Speaker Pelosi believes they should vote as she instructs them to.

These bills aren't so much written as word-processed. No one person can possibly read this much material in the few days permitted to review it. But various members of Congress can cut and paste, double click, and include their favorite pet projects in this massive bill. Their anonymity is virtually guaranteed by the sheer volume of the legislation and the few hours Americans have to digest it.

Most Republicans have resisted, to whatever extent possible, this headlong rush toward passing laws by bypassing the public. In return, Democrats and their media lap dogs excoriate Republicans for being "the party of no." But there is no other rational response to this sort of autocratic law-making. Just as if your government said, "Give us access to your checkbook, we need to do some things," but they refused to tell you what those things were, you would rightly refuse. But that blank check unaccountability is exactly what Democrats are demanding with these bills that no one gets to read until after they become law. They levy taxes, fees, penalties and fines in phonebook-thick legislation, and hand you the tab when they're done.

If Democrats really believe that reading the laws that they are charged with enacting is an unnecessary detail, then why have Congress at all? If lawmakers remain uninformed about their most important Constitutional duty, why not just put every law up for a national vote? An ordinary citizen's guess must be as good as one of our elected representatives.

If lawmakers passing trillion-dollar bills that nobody even bothers to read is a bad idea, let them know. Write a letter, send an e-mail, or text a message. Just don't expect any of them to read it.